‘Vanderpump Rules’ Season 11: How do You Clean up a Scandal?

It’s time to raise your glasses high… VPR is back, friends!

After what feels like a lifetime, the gang from SUR return to bless our screens with, well, more mess (to be frank), but also more looks and more shade than ever before.

For a full episode recap, you can check out this comprehensive download on People.com — and since so many recaps already exist (and because you can just watch it for yourselves on Peacock!), I don’t want to do a basic recap of season 11’s simmering opener. Instead, I want to deep dive into the group dynamic, one by one.

So, strap in, pour yourself a Pumptini, and get ready to dive in—

Every VPR character and how the group dynamic has shifted

Ariana

All hail the queen. Ariana has finally earned her rightful position as the number one gal in this group, since she no longer has roughly ~170 pounds of wimpy man-child weighing her down, and I’m among the lot of you screaming “HALLELUJAH!”

Ariana rubbed me the wrong way for her first few seasons (i.e., gaslighting Kristen, defending Tom even when he was clearly in the wrong, etc.), but over the last few seasons she’d genuinely grown on me. I began to see more clearly the super cool, talented, and reasonable person she is, and it became clear to me that Tommy S. had been casting some sort of weird, wily shadow over her in the earlier seasons (which he alleges was only done to “protect” Ariana, but we all know that’s bullsh*t). Anywho — Ariana has only gotten cooler as the years have gone by, and now that she’s rid of Tom and completely vindicated in her bad-ass revenge tour (and may I say, making the best fashion choices this season!) I love her more than ever.

Tom Schwartz jokingly calls Ariana the “Patron Saint of Scorned Women” in episode one, but I think he’s onto something. Ariana represents a sort of strength we’d all love to see people harness after leaving a toxic relationship, and boy, does she wear it well.

Katie

A queen in her own right for some time now, Katie saw the writing on the wall an entire season ago when it came time to kick her respective Tom to the curb — and though it saddened me at first, it was truly for the best. Nothing has evidenced that more than Katie’s confidence glow-up in the last two seasons, wherein she’s really honed her personal style, stood up for herself in conversations, and held her ground when it comes to protecting her peace and honoring her boundaries.

If you can’t tell, Katie has been my favorite for a while now, and I’m so happy to see her and Ariana take front and center in the new season’s opening sequence (and at ‘Something About Her’, no less)! This is Katie’s freedom era, and I couldn’t be more excited to see her and Ariana team up this season to take down who should’ve been their common enemy all along — the (not-so) mighty, misogynistic TomToms.

James

What can be said for James, other than… he’s now (somehow) the number one guy in this group? To his credit, he’s made huge strides in cleaning up his act the last few seasons, and his personal growth journey has actually been pleasant to watch. I’ve found myself rooting for James the last couple years, because I believe he genuinely wants to be a good person, and put all the sh*tty 20-something-year-old behavior in the past.

He’s proven that in kind by his commitment to quitting drinking, for one, but also in his steadfast commitment to being a better friend to Katie, Ariana, Lala and Scheana. It doesn’t erase the past (wherein he said some despicable things to Kristen and other women), but it does show genuine personal growth in that he now considers the women in the cast and their feelings, thoughts, and accomplishments. He ain’t perfect, but he’s done a hell of a lot more growing up than some of the guys on this show. cough TOM AND TOM cough :'-)

Scheana

I have this feeling in the deepest pit of my stomach that Scheana, though she loves Ariana, is going to do what she does best… flip-flop. Scheana has a complicated history on VPR — is she a “girl’s girl,” or a “pick me”? Is she a genuinely good friend, or does she just want to be liked? We’re going to find out this season, and I’m prepared for the worst, honestly, considering her track record. (Sorry, She-Shu!)

Lala

Speaking of personal growth, Lala has really had some in recent seasons. She’s been through hell and back, and I genuinely feel for (and love) her. She’s an incredible mother, a woman who stands on her business, and now… perhaps the voice for all of us that actually have some empathy for Rachel?

Don’t get me wrong, at first I felt just as Lala did — that Rachel was a horrible person, who did a horrible thing and had no remorse for it. BUT, after truly considering Lala’s (and the internet’s) points about the level of masterful manipulation wormy Tom Sandoval performed on the (honestly) impressionable Rachel, I’ve turned a corner. Like Lala, I still don’t respect what she did and believe she truly effed up, but I also don’t hate the girl. To be fair, I don’t hate Tom either (or anyone), but I definitely have more empathy for Rachel who was genuinely led into the belly of the beast than I do for Tom, who orchestrated the entire affair. I’m on Lala’s side with this one, but it will be interesting to see how she and Ariana interact as they navigate the Rachel-of-it-all this season.

Tom (less evil) Schwartz

Man, oh man. For years I have wanted to like Schwartz. However, he never seems to take any accountability for his actions.

Plus, he has a bug collection now, apparently? He’s a man-child. He hurt Ariana and continues to rub salt in the wound while pulling the “sympathetic sad-sack” act… and I just don’t have much else to say. He’s sort of like a benign lump on a log at this point, and like Katie, I’ve moved on from caring.

Tom (the “worm with a mustache”, the “most extra” evil) Sandoval

I don’t really want to give this guy any more energy, considering I hope the collective pop-culture conscious truly just lets him fizzle out and become yesterday’s news.

To that point, I’m glad he wasn’t in the first episode except for like, thirty seconds and some flashbacks, and I hope he’s not actually going to try and apologize his way back into the group this season. I’m sure he will try, I just hope people don’t fall for it. For years I told fellow viewers something was “off” about Tommy S. (for which I was often roasted alive on the r/vanderpumprules subreddit), and lo-and-behold, I (and Jax, and Kristen, and many others) was right.

I’m over this man. We all should be. Blah, blah, blah.

Lisa

Lisa will always be Lisa. She will always defend the boys, but at least she’s not berating the girls as hard this season. She shows genuine empathy for Ariana’s awkward situation at TomTom in episode one, and that’s at least more than LVP ever did for Kristen Doute. So that’s a plus, I guess? Whatever, she’ll forever be fabulous, and we’ll all always love her either way. Right?

So, what did you think of the Vanderpump season opener? Who are you rooting for (or against) this season? Let’s discuss.

Xoxo,

MM.